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[falteringly]

SEC » 026 » 166 “You... look for purpose, and you must not be defeated by anger or despair.” ( vιdeo | aυdιo | тeхт | acтιon )

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[falteringly]

[ It's in a hallway, rather far down in the ship and somewhere almost quiet. He'd taken to wandering through them, patrolling but mostly due to boredom or some strange urge to just move. Things have been disconnected for a while now, and he doesn't realize what's happening until it's far too late.

Seraphim's name is on the tip of his tongue when he sees her, but it's-- The body is hers, and what's inside is not. It causes him to freeze, to draw up short, and the fear is real on his face as he looks at her (Him), feeling it quiver straight through his grace and to the very core of him.

There is nothing to say, nothing he can do except stand and wait for whatever is about to happen. ]

[majestyofthethrone]

[God looks at him, past the shell of him and to the Grace lurking beneath.]

You cannot hide from Me. Come forward.

[The command is clear and impossible to argue.]

[falteringly]

[ He isn't hiding. Or hadn't wanted to, but now that it's been said aloud, he thinks to. Run away because that's all he's good at doing aside from doing the wrong thing. Castiel curls his fingers tight. ]

Please-- [ Even as he steps forward, he doesn't know what he's begging for. ]

[majestyofthethrone]

[There is a pause, and Seraphim's body is coming forward, stepping closer.]

They sought to take my Throne apart. To find the essence of her soul and unbind Me from it, and kill Us both.

Where were you, Castiel?

Where were you?

[There is pressure, then, at the last bit of speech, at the Voice of God issuing through her body. One of her eyes, white, turns pink from a burst blood vessel, from too much power coursing through her.]

[falteringly]

[ They, he wants to ask. They who? But there is not an ounce of courage inside him now, feeling it shrivel and shrink away to prod at the grace inside of him. Be strong, it says. Be an angel. But all Castiel wants to do is run because it's all he knows, and this is terrifying. ]

I don't know. I--

[ The tremble throughout his entire body is unbidden, and he feels himself buckle, sinking to a knee and head dropped low. ] I'm sorry. Please.

[ His voice is a whisper. ]

[majestyofthethrone]

[Her hand - His hand - finds the top of Castiel's head, and it's a moment.]

You abandoned my Throne.

[There is less rage, perhaps, or maybe it's simply not as intensely focused, for a moment.]

[falteringly]

[ Somehow, he manages not to flinch, but the desperation is clear enough in the clench of his own hands. ]

I won't leave her again. I swear. [ Because this means he's failed. He failed, and there's no way to ask forgiveness for that. ]

[majestyofthethrone]

[There is a quiet pause of acknowledgement, and then His fingers touch Castiel's cheek. It is not forgiveness, not quite, but it is no longer unrestrained rage.]

Her soul is precious. Nothing should touch it.

[Said, with the hint that it is not only because she is His Throne.]

You are the only one here to guard it.

[falteringly]

[ The words aren't nearly as startling as the touch, and somehow, it's different from Seraphim reaching out to him, different in a way that he cannot describe. Castiel still doesn't brave looking up. He can't. ]

I will. [ His voice is soft, full of fear but struggling to reach that promise. ] Whatever you ask of me-- I'll do it.

[majestyofthethrone]

You know what you need to do.

[There is a pause, and then the pressure of God is gone, and Seraphim is sitting, suddenly, like her legs don't support her. Her eyes are normal again, except that one is bloodshot, and she claps her hand over it.

It hurts.]

[falteringly]

[ He knows, but he can't do it right away. Not now, not with everything running through him and distorting all that he is.

Castiel looks up then, the air not so stifling and Seraphim's presence a strange balm on the pressure in his chest. He says nothing as he reaches out to her, palm hovering until he touches his fingers just over the hand covering her eye. His ability to heal has not been right since he'd saved Sam, but this-- He could do this. He can force himself, and he does, his grace eager to be put to work.

When it's done, he simply pulls away and looks at her one last time before there's a flutter of wings, and he leaves her there alone. ]